The Bathing Women by Tie Ning

Author:Tie Ning [Tie Ning]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2014-01-08T16:00:00+00:00

4

Beijing was where Fei was born. She hadn’t been back there since Dr. Tang had taken her away from Denger Alley Elementary School. Beijing stirred all sorts of mixed feelings in her. She could smell shit in every alley, the shit long ago kept in a teacup. But she didn’t hate Beijing. She might be a little crude, but was never muddleheaded at important moments. She understood she couldn’t accuse Beijing of eating shit just because Beijing forced her mother to. Maybe she could say Beijing itself had eaten shit before. It was the era that made a city eat shit. The era had turned many cities into shit-eaters.

She didn’t hate Beijing. Beijing always made her feel stable and expansive. Beijing was different from Fuan, where she was too involved and too occupied; there was no room left in her heart to cultivate Fuan. She left Beijing at a fairly innocent age, so she was able to retain a misty impression of the city, a view that wasn’t too specific, yet not too vague. Her father must live there. She felt strange that she didn’t much miss her mother and uncle, with whom she’d lived. Her longing for her mysterious father remained endless, an unchanged background colour. It became persistent and strong when she was in Beijing. Fei was thankful to Tang Jingjing for never having criticized Fei’s father, but she also never told her who he was and whether he died or was still alive. So Fei chose to believe her father was alive and lived right in Beijing. Sometimes she would bring to mind various images of men and pretend one of them was her father; sometimes she felt her father was Beijing. The city of Beijing was her father, a little aloof and elegant, a little kind and peaceful. She was willing to believe her father hadn’t abandoned her mother and her, but rather that he hadn’t known her mother was pregnant. She absolved her father even when her heart felt most desolate, which brought some warmth into the barrenness. There probably wasn’t going to be any love in her life; only a very small amount was left. She would like to preserve it for the man who gave her life.

She called Fang Jing from a public telephone booth, and he happened to pick up. She identified herself, and Fang Jing went silent for a moment. Then he adjusted himself and talked in a resonant voice. “Oh, it’s you, Comrade Old Tang. Long time, no see. Did you come to Beijing for a conference? Screen script?”

“I must see you today. I came to Beijing just to see you, on behalf of Tiao,” Fei said.

“I should go to your hotel to call on you, but unfortunately there happen to be a few foreigners at the international club—”

Fei interrupted him. “In that case, I can go to your house and wait for you there. I have your address.”

Fang Jing immediately changed his tone. “That’s okay, too. I can come and see you this afternoon.

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